“You Have to Want ”It”—A Leadership Truth

There’s a quote by Tim Gunn that I keep coming back to:

“I can’t want you to succeed more than you want to succeed yourself.”

As I develop my leadership coaching capability, this truth feels even more relevant.

Leaders and coaches often see someone’s potential long before they see it in themselves. We encourage, support, and guide. But there’s a limit to how far we can carry someone else’s growth.

We can hold space.

We can ask powerful questions.

We can champion potential.

But we cannot do the work for someone else.

When we start wanting someone’s success more than they do, roles blur and accountability shifts.

Real growth requires readiness.

Ownership.

Willingness to take a step—and then take the next one.

As we enter a season of reflection and new beginnings, this quote is a reminder:

Success happens when effort and support meet.

When desire aligns with action.

When someone chooses their own growth.

That’s where transformation begins.

The Neutral Zone: Where Real Change Takes Shape

William Bridges’ work on transitions remains some of the clearest guidance on what people truly experience during change.

And my favorite part of his framework is the one most leaders overlook: